Is This Normal?

Dr. Jillian Lopiano Weighs in on your Intimacy Questions.

Betty’s Co. is the next generation of integrative healthcare – providing gynecology, mental health, and healthy living care for the period-havers up to pregnancy-planners. Women’s health is surrounded by stigmas and taboo topics, often preventing them from accessing the care they need. “Is This Normal” is an ongoing Q&A series we host to give our “Betties” the space to ask the awkward questions, develop body literacy and ultimately, normalize women’s health.

Is it normal if my libido is higher or lower than my partner’s?

Some women constantly crave cuddling with their sweetheart. Others prefer a little space, and hey, some might solely take their romantic encounters solo. Great news: all those libidos are normal! And more good news, fluctuating between extra-frisky and eh-not-so-much is okay, too!

Libido is complicated because it considers physical, social, and emotional factors. These factors can change, and your response can change, as well. What feels good, what feels natural, where you are comfortable is your normal! If your libido is negatively affecting your sexual health – whether that’s too high or too low – talk to your gynecologist. We can help you sort through the factors that may be contributing and work through to find a solution.

Is it normal to use lube?

Absolutely! When you’ve decided to have sex, incorporating lubrication is a great choice for many reasons. Lube can make for a more comfortable and more pleasurable experience for any woman at any age. It can also reduce microtrauma to the vagina, reduce the risk of condom breakage, both of which help reduce the risk of sexually transmitted infections. So yeah, safe and pleasurable sex is definitely normal! You’ve got options, too – from oil-based to water and silicone-based varieties. Shop around and find one that works best for you. (P.S. If you plan to use latex condoms, stick to one that’s water or silicone-based!)

Is my female anatomy normal?

Like we tell our Betties: every Betty’s body is unique! “Normal” includes a wide range of shapes and sizes, and that goes for female anatomy, too. To get to know your “normal,” you need to get to know your own body first.

Explore and examine your own body by touch or by using a mirror to check out any hard-to-see places (aka, your vulva!). This can familiarize you with your parts and any physical changes over time. Another getting-to-know-you tool we recommend is tracking your health via an app. Some common metrics to track: menstrual cycle, exercise, weight, and sleep. By knowing your body and its patterns, you become more in tune with how it normally functions. If at any time you are unsure of changes or you have a concern, it’s always best to bring them to your doctor.

To learn more about Betty’s Co. visit bettysco.com.